Generalisations about beer culture

I think you'll find…

When keen, knowledgeable bar staff cross the line and start correcting people, this is what happens.


An innocent looking PUNTER approaches the bar and peers over at the fridges where the bottled beers are stored. After a few moments a bearded semi-goth BARMAN (resembling Dawn of the Dead make-up artist and actor TOM SAVINI) approaches. Throughout the following, he does not blink.


Are you waiting?


Ah, yes. Erm… a couple of weeks ago I came in and you had Weihenstephan Old Bavarian or Old Munich or…

An un-Earthly gleam comes into the BARMAN’s eye. He interrupts.

BARMAN (gleeful but blunt)

Ah! Now, I think you’ll find you’re confusing two completely different beers, namely the Erdinger Dunkelweiss and the Augustiner Edelstoff. We’ve never had the Weihenstephaner dunkel weiss.


Well, I’m not sure I am confused. It was definitely by Weihenstephan. It had a sort of brownish red label. And it was a dark lager, rather than a dark wheat beer…

BARMAN (abruptly)

There is no such beer! We’re out of all of our dunkel weisses, including the Weheinstephaner.

There is an awkward silence. The BARMAN switches into lecture mode.

Perhaps you’d like something called Rrrrraushbier? It’s smoky tasting because the producers use…


It’s fine, thanks. I think I’ll go.

The bewildered PUNTER leaves shaking his head.

The moral of this story? Try not to use the phrase “I think you’ll find…” at the start of a sentence. Exactly like the words “I’m not racist but…”, it will mark you out as a buffoon.

8 replies on “I think you'll find…”

In a bar I’m actually very fond of I recently encountered something similar. We ordered a beer that was about 0.1% less in terms of ABV than what we’d had before. He was absolutely insistent that we MUST go up in strength, and that heading south – even by a fraction of a percent – would spell doom. It took ages to convince him, and even when we did he left shaking his head.

The, now retired, landlord of my local used to ask customers who bought lager. “Do you want a rusk with that?” Funny but maybe not appreciated by the customer, maybe Wychwood could use it in their next campaign.

I think we all would prfer bar staff who didn’t bully their customers even if it is well meant.

Sad cases as those are common in every corner of the world.
There’s a German style pub in my local town where the landlord is always boasting about his 20 years as a professional, especially when defending his points in an discussion on beer. His position when you don’t think as he does is always that of complacency,looking down on you a bit.

We usually drink the fantastic Aventinus at this bar .The other day we ordered a round and he served us Weinstephan dunkles weizen claiming it was the same type of beer and open them up as quickly as he could. I refuse mine trying to explain the difference in style. He tried to convinced me but I stick on my guns ,changed on a pint of Einbecker shaking my head and promising not to come back( at least for a while hehehehe, unfortunately it’s the only hole in town serving Einbecker and John bull on tap and a wide range of Saint Peter’s
in bottle )

Customer service is something still sadly lacking in this country. When I use the word ‘service’ I include that to mean having some respect for basically those that pay the wages. Respect should always be mutual though.

I always think that anyone that says “I’m not racist but…”, should always follow it with “us fascists are lying bastards”.

Customer service is something still sadly lacking in this country.

It’s not so great here in the US either. I’m not just talking about pubs unfortunately. A general lack of respect for the customer seems to be making its way around the globe. It’s a real pet peeve of mine. A friend and I considered starting a website detailing negative customer service experiences we’ve had in the Houston, TX area. We’d include positive experiences too, but unfortunately that would be the smaller section of the site.

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