The Session

Session #78: Elevator Pitch for Beer

The elevator from The Shining.

Session #78 is hosted by James at Beer Bar Band: ’30 seconds is all you have to sell your pitch for better beer, before the lift reaches the destination floor. There’s no time, space or words to waste.’

Here’s how we’d go about it if we absolutely had to.

  • Ahem.
  • We see you like beer. It’s great, isn’t it?
  • It’s refreshing and thirst-quenching, and so delightfully intoxicating!
  • If you pick a really tasty one, it can be an incredible, unforgettable experience, right?
  • And it’s still possible to buy an interesting beer for less than the cost of an All-Day Breakfast sandwich, can you believe?
  • There’s so much history and culture to explore, too, if that’s your thing.
  • You know what — if you like [OTHER PERSON’S BEER], you’d probably love [SIMILAR BUT MORE INTERESTING BEER].
  • Anyway, this is our floor. Byeeeee!

(OK, we cheated a bit: apparently, you can’t use hyperlinks when speaking to people in real life. Real life is so overrated.)

His or her reaction? ‘Well, that was obnoxious. I hope I never become the kind of person who would buttonhole someone in a lift and badger them about my hobby. I’m going to stick to drinking plain, simple, everyday beer to be on the safe side.’

And that’s why you don’t pitch beer at people in elevators.

2 replies on “Session #78: Elevator Pitch for Beer”

kinda what i thought, unless you are running an elevator bar, which could be an awesome idea…

You’d maybe get hustled out of the hotel with that one but maybe not banned for life.

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